Fourteen

It seems impossible, doesn't it?  That this little imp with the sunshine smile and the white-blond hair, in the blink of an eye, is somehow taller than me, finishing up her 8th grade year, and turning fourteen?

When the kids were little I worried about how it would be to parent teenagers. Teens seemed inordinately tall, and rather unfathomable at the time.  

Well, here we are and I am here to say-  parenting teenagers is pretty much the bomb.  

Do I sometimes (often) miss those days of tiny hands in mine, soft round cheeks, naps and snacks and utter reliance on me?  Sure.  There is nothing quite like the way your tiny one needs you, to fill your heart. 

Do I miss the exhaustion and depletion and tiny frustrations of those years?  The waiting by they crib for baby to wake so we could go to the store, the 10 minutes of finagling in and out of carseats for every errand, the constant vigilance for their safety in each new environment.  Not so much.

Plus, my teenagers are not just (increasingly) independent- they are also really cool humans in their own right.  People I enjoy spending time with, funny and bright, who make me insanely proud every day.

Each stage has its own unique surprises and fulfillments, doesn't it? 

And my sunshine girl is as beautiful as ever.  Taller, and with more curls and less white-blond, but with that same fascinating combination of sweetness and tenacity that has been at her core from birth.

Ivy at fourteen is...

A lover of horses and her cat.  Her two happy places are the barn and snuggled with Sunny in her clothing-lined nest of a room.

An absolute introvert.  She draws energy from books (and animals) and solitude, and does not like to go anywhere that is crowded, including out to eat.  She has a small, close friend group and likes it that way, and sees no reason to talk to other people or go places outside of her comfort zone.  Which leads me to note that she is also...

Strong minded and tenacious in her opinions.  Once Ivy has decided (quickly and with certainty) that is the way it shall be and there is no changing her mind.  She knows herself and speaks her mind and does not tolerate fools. She does not believe in social smiling or hiding her thoughts to save other's feelings.  But in the midst of all that strength, she is also...

Deeply kind and loving.  Those perfectly customized gift bags for her friends.  The quiet way she seeks out her parents to watch TV and chat (her preferred way to spend time with us).  The care she puts in to her animals and her baking and her arts and crafts.  Acts of service and gifts are Ivy's love language instead of hugs.

She is also highly creative, always teaching herself new techniques.  Her favorite medium continues to be paint but she has added crochet (without a pattern!) to the list this year.  

She is a voarcious reader, going through up to 3 books per week.  Her favorite genres right now are young adult romance and fantasy.

She is a focused and accomplished student, finishing her 12th quarter on the Honor Roll in middle school.  She loves her MSSP classes and Project Lead the Way, does well in but does not like math, and makes no bones about her dislike for Social Studies.  Regardless you can count on her to be caught up on her work. She still eats lunch in the library -- a quiet place with books, another happy place for her.  Next week is her final band concert, as she has decided not to continue Tuba in highschool, in preference for art classes and CCP courses.  Ambitious girl.   She's also not going to conitnue with the COYC next year.  A disappointment to me, mainly because I know how much joy music and theater brought me in high school and I want those things for her.  But one of the fun things about motherhood is seeing how your kids turn out to be absoulutely themselves, from day one.  And it is ok if her Self is very different from me.  (As long as she still finds her joy)

I do miss the days of my sunshine girl snuggling for long hugs (remember how I thought she'd cosleep FOREVER) and asking for just one more song, one more book, one more air-kiss from the doorway at night... but I am so immensly proud of the independent, articulate, strong willed young adult that, at fourteen, she is just on the cusp of becoming. 

 

A backyard party for Ivy

This silly, smart, beautiful girl turns 14 in three days.  We celebrated her over the weekend with a lovely little backyard party for her closest friends.  It was a joy to watch these sweet young people talk and laugh and play hammock wars and get creative with glow sticks.  They are kind and accepting and creative and fun loving and I am so glad my girl has surrounded herself with this amazing group of humans.

As is the tradition for Ivy's party day, the weather held (except for a bit of drizzle) and we were able to be outside the whole time. And as is the new tradition for Ivy's party, she planned the whole day including food, activities and decorations (which she kindly let mom help with a little bit) and baked her own cake (strawberry shortcake this year).  I was most impressed with her exceedingly thoughtful goody bags- we ordered the inspirational totes and then she hand-embroidered each guests name before adding their favorite candy and a hand-crocheted octopus in their favorite color.  I am immeasurably proud of her kind heart.

Contrary to the gnomes you see everywhere, reader, there was no theme for this party... :)

The party was scheduled for 5 to 9 and we had girls at the house til 10.  Also they broke both the hammock and our decrepit old picnic table without anyone getting hurt.  So, a successful party by all measures. 

 

April

Plenty of showers- and plenty of flowers!  April treated us gently during a time of transition for all of us.

Celebrating Joely's birthday at the barn.  I am so grateful for this gentle and loving environment, where my kiddo is supported to be brave and independent.  She and Vio love the barn so much.

Preparing for Eclipse day with my sweeties at school...

Enjoying the cherry blossoms at Wade Lagoon- a fleeting treasure.

Welcoming Jen home to Cleveland- and celebrating Holly's new home!

A visit to Daffodil hill, where our children refused to pose for photos.

Then off to Rockefeller greenhouse, where they finally warmed up to the day and, of course, played tag on the green,  We have created some very tradition-bound children here.

Eclipse day!  A glorious blue sky day.  We gathered at Keith's house with old and new friends- and the experience of totality was so utterly amazing.  Breathtaking.  Time out of time.  And then, 4 minutes later-- life as usual again.  I can't believe this event we'd been anticipating for years has come and gone so quickly. But I will forever be grateful to have witnessed it.

My spring bulbs, popping up in random patches-- a cottage-core vibe, my friend calls it- make me so very happy.

Last concert of the season for me in COC- Belshazzar's Feast.  It was a wicked peice to learn, for me, but all the notes and rythms finally came together and Concert two was sublime.

Enjoyed an end-of-season gathering with Chorus peeps over at the Jolly Scholar.  

And a series of blue-sky beautiful days, with beach time and the first kayak of the season.

Got my Dahlia bulbs in.  And now we wait.

Ivy did the lion's share of party prep all on her own this year.  Here are the hand-crocheted octopi she made for her guests- in each girl's favorite color.  I love that girl's heart so much.

Celebrated Holly's new place with a wonderful housewarming party.

Old friends, new friends, so much cheese-- and candy literally everywhere.  I am so very lucky to be loved and supported by these amazing people. 

Amazing people who played along and had a great time with Questions and Answers.  A sure way to find out if a group of people are *my* people. 

More kayaking!  A delicious day with the calmest lake.

Grateful for sunshine and gentle days this month...